As much as it’s not a wife’s job to have to educate her husband — he should be motivated to be the best parent possible in his own — I wonder if it would be beneficial to reframe this issue in work jargon (since he loves his damn job so much).

Perhaps proposing that he’s falling short on his endeavor as a parent and that he’s lost the confidence of his co-investor and managing partner, and it’s time to implement a corrective action plan and consult some subject matter experts to discuss next steps will help.

Things such as cognitive development, appropriate communication based upon age, understanding the difference between joy and frustration in a 4 year old, etc., can be discussed with a family therapist or a family attorney/judge, or both, his choice.

Just a thought.