Good thoughts, clearly stated. I’m wondering if for a heteronormative Judeo-Christian type society, many people just think of “feminine” as subordinate-presenting (even if you’re not particularly retiring naturally) and accentuating secondary sex characteristics?

I think for a lot of people, they like things to be simple, and they use that as context on how they are going to relate to a woman (sadly). They feel put out and annoyed that some women get “out of uniform” and they have to get to know someone on an individual basis, so, they don’t. They make a new category and put all the out of context people in it, like their own personal Island of Misfit Toys.

When society shifts, or they have a personal connection to someone in that (in their mind) group, they may grow/change, but it’s a struggle, because they may feel that may be an admission that they were previously mistaken.