I think this article has a lot of great points, but I’m thinking about my husband and his father; there’s a strange thing that happens and I think it’s common.

When things are difficult for us, my father in law is offended not to be consulted for help: but on the rare occasion he’s consulted him, he shames my husband for being an idiot and tells everyone in the family what a fool his son is.

My feeling is that this is what everyone fears will happen if they ask a question or display vulnerability, but I’ve noticed many men doing this to men they perceive to be lower status.