If you could change who you are, or who you love to please them, would you? Probably not. So, just no.

Second, would they be pleased? Again, nope. You’d still be the object of suspicion and rejection. So again, no.

Allow them the you-free wedding of their dreams. Truthfully, you both may be more of a presence at the wedding that way than if you attended.

I’d still send a gift, something good TO THE KIDS, from the both of you. Have Uncle put it front and center at the gift table, wrapped it kid-special wrap, so they see it. Let them take your gifts back from children!