Walter, I agree with you. I also think that this runs parallel to the concept of “boundaries” to these people. They believe boundaries are limits they put on others (not that individuals have for themselves); when, for example, their adult children start to learn how to implement boundaries in order to achieve some semblance of normalcy in their lives, they are so incandescent with rage that the person they believe should be a doormat has some autonomy, they choose estrangement over respecting the reasonable boundaries (don’t insult me/my child/spouse, or I’ll have to end our visit, whatever). Then they act like they don’t know how you became so hypersensitive/crazy/emotional! Same deal.